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Wednesday, May 10, 2006, 11:03 PM
Drowning myself~
days have been so hectic for me, everyday's routine is to do tutorial, and more is to come!! im really drowning le! urghhh dun even feel like bloggin lar, so mani unhappy things has happen..
endless tutorial to be done, endless project deadline to be met.and worst the new pple in my life. my tian~ wad is my world becoming into?!?!?!?!?! sian~
anywayyyyy celebrated mav bday on mon, hahas.. we planned a steamboat dinner for her, haha quite fun had the feeling of one big family. when i told her to go jerry hse on mon she thot we were goin to eat shepherd's pie, ahah we not xiuling ar mav!! lols we're creative pple lols.. rented the movie Stepford wives, dumb show i mus say lols =P yep its true, think i'll jus rate it 21/2 star lols dun waste moni watch dis kinda tupid show.. the show was supposedly to be horror and comedy, BUT its neither to me, i didn't find myself laughing and scared.. haha
tired~ vexed~ drained~ dead~ wadeva u call it, jus cant find a breath to catch.esp with the change of class, wth me and vincent is the only one from another klass la! somemore guys can mingle very easily, gals are more ji qiao over dis small little stuff.. he alrdy apart of dem le lor..hai~ i realli duno whose group im in sometimes.. and have to hou ze nian pi ask pple to accept me in their grp. wad is this!! i hate BA la, appealed and told dem my reason of changing module group dey still ignored me *shakehead* TSK!! i wana bang my head against the wall le.. i think the main reason for my tiredness is to deal with all these nonsense!! 41/2 i miss u all deeply! arghh if im in TB06 the whole situation will be the opposite.. maybe God jus wan me to be in others pple shoe for a change, to learn to love the weirds more?? i duno but im tryin to ba..
now i duno im in whose OM group, apparently the klass pple alrdy went ard collecting pple, sian la, y is pple lidat?! y can't dey jus be more sociable?! y can't dey be more open to pple??? im damn sian lar in dilemma again~ on one hand i start off quite well with this yr 3 gal, cant neglect her lar! now if i go join another group will be like pushing her aside, i den dun wan be like the TB03s lar!! but okay la i understand if im in their shoes i'll do dat too~ but now since im at the receiving end, receiving all this crap i really feel i shouldnt do dis to the yr3 gal. what shld i do???!! i realli duno..
haha all of a sudden i remb wad cheryl said, when u're alone in someplace doesnt mean u're lonely. chim? haha and most importantly u have God! yep i noe im not lonely, but jus feel v. uncomfortable and have had it to be in dis kinda situation.. previously when we were choosing EC group mates, i literally had to ask the tutor to allow 5person in a grp la, coz i jus realli cant do it wib benny. its too big a proj to do with someone i dun noe and is weird. hais! this time the gals went and gathered 6pple in their grp so apparently i have to find a way out. like u noe they sealing their grp so dat as long as with 6 no more can come in. sian! i think wad dey tryin to say is now very LOUD. hmmm i still feel dat dey somehow dun like me to be in their grp, as if im tryin to replace anione or tryin to be one of dem. problem is im not! and i'll nv be apart of dem, im apart of 41/2!! and for me i jus wana get the proj over and done with.. y mus dey implicate so mani tings in!~ hais de way dey do tings like as if i duno, but its so damn obvious wad they're doing la.. and it hurts me most to think dey can jus throw other pple's feelings aside.. realli hate it hate it!!
dun feel like sayin animore.. my feelings are realli up and down recently, i realli just need to cheer up~
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